Carrie Baker – The Growth Collective

I see you. You over there going through the motions, just keeping your head above water. I see your google searches ‘What’s wrong with me?’, because you know you’re not really ill, but you can’t work out what is happening in your body, in your heart and in your thought life.

You’ve read the articles and worked out that it is most likely that your soul is weary, and you realise this is why you feel the way you do. Maybe you have come across this post and want to know if this is what you are suffering from. Here are some symptoms you will experience, if you are suffering from a weary or exhausted soul:

• You’re tired even when you feel that you are getting enough sleep.

• You don’t enjoy the things that you usually do.

• Your emotions are really intense, and swing between the extremes.

• You feel more negative, low or even depressed and your mental health isn’t great.

• You may feel lonely or alone in life despite your family, friends or your support network.

• You have a sense of dread when you think about going to work or other commitments you have.

• You long for a simpler life and find that you wish you could step out of yours and into a new one.

• You feel like you are running on autopilot.

• You feel it in your body, those random aches and pains that just appear.

• You feel disconnected from your life.

How many statements on this list relate to how you’re feeling? These won’t just go away on their own, if you ignore them for long enough, if anything, these feelings will only build up.

What causes your soul to become weary?

The cause of this, is simply Modern Life.

This life you live, in the here and now demands so much of you. You are constantly engaged; interacting with people, your social media accounts, the news, all the notifications, the messages…well, the list goes on. Not only all of this, but work demands are greater, more effort, more hours, more output, more progress. The news alone, is enough to affect your soul. The state of the world is enough to grieve your soul and make you want to go and live off grid on a far away island (preferably with great weather and lovely beaches).

People, generally speaking, are also creatures of habit, moving around their days and weeks in the very same patterns and it takes too much effort and energy (that they don’t have), to get off the hamster wheel.

How do you recover from this?

The way heal and restore your soul, is by looking after your body. How you FEEL affects your physically. When you are stressed and anxious it shows up as symptoms in your body. Here are some simple ways that you can begin to heal your weary soul.

1. Find quiet.

When was the last time you sat in a quiet place? Really honestly, when did you last sit without your phone in your hand, or your earbuds in, or with your TV or tablet switched off? In a world that shouts constantly for your attention, your soul needs moments of quiet and stillness. Look for those small chunks of time, schedule it in, block it out in your calendar and do it. Turn of your phone or devices, or at least put them in another room.

Sit somewhere comfortable, close your eyes if you want to, and breathe deeply. Feel your body relax and sink into the seat. Let your mind wander to positive thoughts, or happy memories. Think of the things in your life you are grateful for. If you have a favourite bible verse or quote, meditate on the words. Or even say a prayer. If you find this difficult or it’s something you aren’t used to, begin with five minutes. As you get used to this practice, take more time as you learn to be still, and let your soul rest.

Another way you can bring more quiet into your life, is by turning off most of the notifications and banners on your devices. 90% of your apps don’t need your instant attention, or to be checked as soon as something happens. Or even limit the time you spend on social media, set a timer for how long you will scroll and then put it down. Learn to queue, wait, commute, to sit or go for a walk without being plugged in, and give your soul some quiet. Listen to the birds or even the world around you. Give your mind the space to roam, to think and rest.

2. Listen.

When you talk honestly about how you feel with a trusted loved one, listen to what you say. As you speak about the things in life you are struggling with, you’ll find that you start to talk about the circumstances that are making life difficult. Once you begin to give words to these things, you become aware and then can do something about it.

Or even if you aren’t a sharer of feelings, you can journal about it and write it all out. You often need to outwardly process you thoughts and feelings for you to make sense of them. By doing the outward processing, it also helps you to offload some of those knotted up thoughts.

Listening to your body is really important. Often we are so busy that we can’t hear it. What is your body telling you right now? Does it need rest, or to get out in the sunlight and get moving? Does it need a big glass or water or hearty, healthy meal? Do your muscles need to be unknotted and massaged? Does your body need to be stretched? Does it need the comfort of a heat pack or a cosy blanket? Or even just to sit by the water somewhere and be soothed. It’s good to listen to your body, to take the time to give it what it needs.

To know when to rest is not weak, it shows wisdom and strength. It takes courage to know when to say no, and to invest time into looking after yourself. Life isn’t a sprint but a marathon. You need to pace yourself, and rest when your body and soul need it.

3. Grace for yourself.

You won’t see real photos on social media of soul exhaustion, because it’s all about those picture perfect moments, and people #livingtheirbestlife. But I can guarantee that some of the people you pass in the street feel similar to the way you do. Life hasn’t been normal for a long time now. Navigating the constant changes, the ups and downs of living with COVID and in a world where war is on the doorstep.

Don’t underestimate the changes that are happening in your own world. Small changes cause ripples in your life, the bigger the change the bigger the ripples. It’s ok to take time to adjust to changes, and it’s normal for the things going on in the world around you, to affect you. You feel it in your soul and you feel it in your body. Have grace for yourself. You are human. You don’t have an endless supply of energy, and there is only so much you can handle. Give yourself permission to not feel ok all the time. There are seasons in life, this one won’t last forever.

4. Find joy.

When you feel joyful, it can energise you like you’ve just spent time plugged in charging. I don’t mean happiness, happiness can be fleeting. I am talking about that deep joy.

When did you last feel joy?

Sometimes you find yourself getting into a negative spiral, where you find your thoughts are feelings going round and round on a negative loop. If you feel you would like to break that negative loop, here are some practical ways you can find joy again:

Creativity – being creative can unlock a part of your brain that is only used when you’re being creative. It can be as simple as colouring with pencils, doodling with a pen on paper, playing with play-dough, build something with Lego, or dust off your paints and have a go. It doesn’t even have to be good, but the process is releasing and so enjoyable.

Stories – Watch a heartwarming movie, or a good comedy. Or read an uplifting book. You will feel rested after immersing yourself in a good story for a while. These stories, whether you watch them or read them, can remind you that life is good.

Practice gratitude – When you make time to practice gratitude, it lifts your focus from the negative thoughts to the things in life you are so grateful for. A great time for you to do this is in the morning as you wake up, thinking about the things you feel grateful for, is a wonderful way to begin your day. Also, at the end of the day when you lay down to sleep, is a brilliant time too. Ending your day with feeling grateful for the good in your life, for the people that you love, is a wonderful practice. You could even say a prayer of thanks as you do.

What wings are to a bird, and sails are to a ship, so is prayer to the soul. – Corrie ten Boom

5. Getting out in nature.

Connecting with the natural world around us, walking those beautiful paths, does wonders for your soul. Have you noticed that once you’re out striding along the winding forest trails, or letting the sea air kiss your cheeks as you walk the beach, or just looking out over the distant hills, it makes you feel so alive? You were created to live within the natural world, not shut away in office buildings and the walls of homes every hour of every day. Making time to get out and see the beauty in the world around you, to experience it with all your senses, will heal your tired soul, one walk at a time.

There are so many other things that could be listed here, but that would make a rather long post! Please share this post with others who you feel would benefit from reading it, life is hard, but we make it better when we do it together.

I hope this post has been helpful to you. You are not alone in how you feel, and this too will pass. There is hope for your weary soul. Let it rest and heal.

With love,

Carrie xxx

*Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional, if your mental health issues are significant or you are having suicidal thoughts, please seek help immediately from your GP, a helpline, or tell someone you trust. Also, if you are experiencing concerning health problems, make an appointment with your GP and get it checked out.

Photo credit: v2osk Unsplash