Carrie Baker – The Growth Collective

Have you ever felt like you needed to shrink yourself to fit into someone else’s expectations of who they think you should be? 

I think we can all say that we have been there.

I have been on my own personal growth journey these past 5 years, and a big part of that, has been learning to embrace all the parts of myself that make up the whole picture of who I’ve been created to be.

To be honest with you, I’m still learning to not just love all those pieces of me, but I’m still learning about all of those parts. 

Let me share a personal story with you for a moment.

When I was a child, I didn’t feel like I could take up the space I needed to. From a very young age,I had a big personality, I was chatty, I had big feelings and was generous with my affections. I was quick to love and be everyone’s bestie. 

But as I got older, those parts of me began to be made fun of, were teased and put down, and words were spoken over my life that I carried for years. 

I made myself smaller and more acceptable for others, by dimming a light that wanted to freely shine from me.

Do you know what? It’s those exact inner qualities that felt needed to be made smaller, are the things I need right now in my life, to do all the things the Lord has called me to. 

I came across a writing prompt once, to help heal the wounds of childhood. Shall I tell you about it?

The task was to write a letter to my younger self, by first closing my eyes, and imagining a younger version of me, what came to my mind was 11 year old me. (I can’t remember who to credit for this – feel free to tell me if you know)

Do you know what? 

Writing this letter was really healing. As I wrote, the tears flowed with the words on my paper. I realised so many things about who I am created to be.

In this letter, I told ‘Young Carrie’ that she was exactly as much as she should be, she wasn’t ‘too much’. And that all the things she felt she had to make smaller about herself, were all the things needed to love and help all the people she can now, BECAUSE of these things.

I wrote that one day, she would see that these were her best qualities, all given to her for a specific plan and purpose over her life.

I realised in writing this letter, that I was always exactly who I was meant to be.

This exercise healed some of those past hurts. It made me love and accept that younger version of myself as well as this current one, even more.

It also enabled me to give myself permission to take up the space the Lord has given me, in all the different spheres I occupy. (I am still always learning how to do this better!)

It says in Psalms 139:14; “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made…”

Let’s take a look at how we can live as we are intended to:

You Are Positioned: 

Take a moment to think about your everyday, every week, life. There are places that go to and spend time at, daily, weekly or monthly. These are places where you have been positioned. 

Let me ask you this question: 

Where has the Lord placed you, in life right now? 

• Where do you go to work?
• Who do you share your home with?
• Where do you do your weekly shopping?
• Who do you see on the school run?
• Where do you volunteer?
• What groups are you a part of?
• Where do you regularly go for coffee/lunch/dinner?
• Where do you exercise?
• Where do you live and who are your neighbours?

You can probably think of more, but all the space you occupy is where you have been positioned.

Everywhere you go, you bring all the qualities, gifts, talents and energy that God has given you. 

You have permission to show up as your whole and fullest self in all of those places, because you have been created and called by the Lord, to be YOU in all these spaces.

You are not who you are, or positioned where you are, by accident. You are exactly the right person in all the right places you occupy. We can trust that as we follow Jesus, he is leading our life along the paths he has planned for us.

You Empower Others:

By being your fullest version of yourself, you empower others to do the same. 

Your workmates, friends, family and acquaintances will watch as you allow yourself to fully bloom, and that will give them the permission they need to do the same.

Someone out there needs what you bring through who you are, but also the example you set in the authentic way you are called to live your life. 

Let Jesus be the example you look to for this. We read in the New Testament how he didn’t follow the social norms of the time, because his calling was above all of that. 

This segways beautifully into my next point…

You Will Find Opposition:

We are creatures of habit and comfort. So be prepared and don’t be surprised when you find that people struggle with you authentically taking up the space you’ve been given.

Some people may find that your authenticity challenges or convicts them. Or they prefer the safe and small version of you. Keep being the best version of yourself with them, let them be them. Don’t let someone else’s opinion of you, make you doubt who the Lord has made you to be, or cause you to live in a way that doesn’t align with who you are called to be.

God has plans and purposes for your life (Jeremiah 29:11). This in no way translates into living small. 

We are called to go into all the world and make disciples. What Jesus means by ‘go into all the world’, is YOU, and WHERE you have been positioned, or where he CALLS you to go to.

How You Take Up Space:

Your everyday life is the perfect opportunity to take up more space.

“And how do I do this?” I hear you ask…

Here are some examples:

• Be 100% who the Lord has created you to be.
• Use the gifts, spiritual gifts, talents, qualities in all the spaces you occupy – not just reserved for church on a Sunday.
• Let your light shine wherever you are.
• Love others well.
• Share your life with those around you, and absolutely your faith. People are desperate to hear about hope and a better way to live.
• Let people have their opinions – their thoughts about you are none of your business.

As Ephesians 2:10 says, “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” 

Read that again for yourself:  “For I am God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for me to do.” You. The fullness of who you have been created to be.

What is one thing you can do today to start living more authentically? Share it with me, I would love to hear about it.

Friend, the world needs you, all you are created to be. Take up your space and live the life you were made for. Start today by taking one small step toward your authentic self.

Share this with a friend who needs to hear it, we can all do with being reminded of this!

If you want to know more about our coaching program or even just for a power hour session, hit the reply button!

I’m here to keep encouraging you to keep growing friend,

Carrie x

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