Carrie Baker – The Growth Collective

This blog post directly follows the one I wrote last week, about ways to give yourself more time for your goals, things that bring you joy or that dream you are going after. If you want to catch up on that before you read this one, you can get that here.

Now that you have made a plan and you have managed to painstakingly carve out some extra time for those important things, I have a warning for you.

Beware the time stealers *cue dramatic music.. da da daaaaaaaaa!

I don’t want to crush your newfound sense of enthusiasm for all that great things you’re going to do, because you’ve totally got this! But… there will be frustrations along the way, some of them in the form of ‘time stealers’. It may even feel a bit like Murphy’s Law, that as soon as you set your intentions, things can go a little sideways.

It might seem like the universe is conspiring against you, trying to stop you from ever getting into your new routine, and making use of that time you’ve wrestled back for yourself.

I want to help you to recognise those possible time stealers and give you tools to keep you on track. There will definitely be some bigger situations that call trumps on your time, such as emergencies, illness, children, pets etc. Then there are the small and sneaky time stealers, on the periphery of your vision, just waiting for a moment of weakness.

Let’s go through a few so you know what time stealers to look out for:

Your phone.

This is the biggest one, that comes in under the ‘sneaky’ section.

(In case you missed my last blog post, I made a confession about wasting time on my phone – you can read that here) You can easily fall into the vortex that is social media while going to check the weather, or even down a random hole under the very innocent pretext of ‘research’.

The ‘tired’ excuse.

The one where we use tiredness as a reason. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve pulled this one out of the bag, “Think I’ll take it easy tonight, it’s been a busy day, I’m kinda tired…” Can someone come and pour hot tea over me if I say this please? There are definitely times you really need to switch off and recharge and you have my FULL permission to do so. But, we all know when we’re just using it as an excuse.

On a side note, did you know that when you’re tired, you can work really well while using your creative brain? I have been surprised how many times I cracked on with writing when I was tired at the end of the day, only to be shocked by what I actually managed to achieve! Your brain is an amazing machine, and it can make brilliant connections even when we are tired while in ‘creating mode’. Sorry, I’ve made the tired excuse void!

If you want to read more about this phenomena, you can read an article here.

Your people.

They can be time stealers too. They don’t mean to be, it’s that sometimes they just don’t get it.

It might be a friend hearing you’ve got ‘all this free time now, let’s do coffee’. Or someone is suddenly ill right when you were getting excited for your creative time.

Or someone schedules something else and suddenly it means you’re home with the kids and not free to have your time.

It took a long time of me trying to communicate how important my writing is to me, before my husband understood. I felt like I was waiting for him to give me permission to really go for it. (Which is ridiculous now I think about it, I needed to give myself permission. If you feel like I did, have a read of this post here)

You need to make those in our life, our partners, family and friends, aware that this thing you are carving out time for, is really important to you. Even if they don’t completely understand yet, or maybe they aren’t quite on board, tell them what you need from them. We will cover this one a little later.

The never-ending ‘To Do’ list.

That thing that you rarely get to the end of before a lot of other things get written on it. Your ‘To Do’ list could be staring you down from wherever you left it, making you feel like you can’t give yourself the time to do your important thing. Let me tell you some crucial information: Your To Do’s, the washing, folding, the home admin, the housework will still be there when you’re done working on your thing. You don’t need to clear the way by finishing your list first, you will never get to the end of it.

Your feelings.

They sure can be time wasters and get in the way. You know the ones I’m talking about. Let’s name them shall we?

Guilt likes to show up, a LOT! Guilt tries to tell you that you’re neglecting x,y and z by taking this time for yourself. Do me a favour and tell that guilt to go and slam it’s head in the door.

What about self doubt, that sneaky one, showing up telling you you’re not good enough and you won’t accomplish anything anyway… you know where to flush that rubbish self talk.

Denial is in there too, telling you that it’s not really that important, it’s probably not really what you’re meant to do with your life, it feels too hard to make it work anyway… I’m sure you have others you can name for yourself.

There are so many more time stealers I could list, but for me, these are the ones that show up a lot.

A little ray of hope.

There is always hope… For all those moments your time is taken from you, let me tell you some positives:

• It solidifies your desire for your time, and your determination grows.

• It will ensure that you will make the absolute MOST of your time when it comes around again!

• It affirms how important it is to you.

Tools to keep you on track and help you protect your time:

• Put your phone on aeroplane mode if you can. If not, put it on focus mode, silence it or even put it way out of reach. If you’re using it as a timer, make it inconvenient to get to.

• Put your plans in the diary. By doing this you’re committing to spending that time on your thing. If you have a shared diary with others (like on google calendar) you can mark out that time for yourself and they know it’s your time. Set up a reminder on your phone, so you can start well and not waste any time.

• Be prepared. If you need a space set up, clothes laid out or whatever you need for that focussed time, get ready what you can beforehand so you can jump straight in. This will mean you can fully use all the time you have set aside.

• Be intentional. By deciding what you will be doing with your time, you are committing to this time, you set the the expectation, you can mentally prepare and look forward to it.

• Communicate with your people. Tell your partner, family or your friends what you need to make this time happen. Let them know how important this time is for you and the ways they can help you make it happen. If it’s a pep talk or someone to make you accountable to use your time, give them permission to do so. Perhaps someone can have your children, give you a space to use or whatever way they can help you. Bringing others in, builds your community and a support system to help you.

* Delay. Sometimes we get invitations to meet for coffee or for this or that, and we feel under pressure to give an immediate response. You can delay committing to plans, by saying that you need to check your diary first and get back them. This gives you time to make sure you have time and you’re not giving up your valuable time that you set aside to work on your important goal, dream or something that fills you.

*Be bendy. Sometimes you will need to be flexible and bendy. Learning to be adaptable when we need to change and rearrange our time when it’s possible, will help us to navigate the unknowns in life.

This is not an extensive list, I’m sure that you have some of your own to add. I would love to hear your’s, let me know in the comments below!

There will be times when things don’t go to plan, you aren’t productive with your time, or there is a huge interruption. It’s ok, these things happen and there is always next time.

Don’t see it as a failure when life gets in the way. Have grace for yourself when things get wonky, take a breath, and keep holding tightly on to that goal or dream.

It will happen, I know you can do this!

If this blog post has been helpful to you, please give it a like and share this post on your social media pages, or even with a friend! I would love to hear the ways your time is stolen, let me know in the comments below.

Or you can show your appreciation by fuelling my writing and Buy Me A Coffee Here!

Sending you love friend,

Carrie

Photo credit :: Aron Visuals / Unsplash